Still Imperfect: Celebrating Imperfectly B’s One Year Anniversary!

Wow, it’s hard to believe that it’s been a whole year since the start of Imperfectly B! Time stays flying by.

First off, I have to say THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, to each and every one of who read and support and share this site of mine! I don’t say it enough, but it means the absolute world to me, I promise. Yes, I’m building this new brand, but it’s much more important for me to inspire and positively impact others, and pass along more good vibes in this crazy world we live in. I hope I’ve done that in some way for each of you.

As I’ve opened up about before, I started this site at a pretty rough time in my life. I was all over the place mentally when it came to feelings about my career, my relationship, and my home life. I was losing love and inspiration for my entertainment site, The Spotlight, and I was struggling still with losing both my grandmother and aunt in 2015 and 2016. I put on a good front for most people, but my immediate family knew I wasn’t good. I held a lot in to the point of exploding at random sometimes. Underneath the facade, I was so angry, hurt, and bitter about it all, and couldn’t recognize the person I was becoming. I still have bad moments about some things, but it’s gotten a lot better, thank God.

After months of feeling uninspired and unmotivated, I felt led by God to give up Spotlight and to start this site. Sure, there are a million and one inspirational speakers, positive websites, etc. out there. But I NEEDED something positive of my own. Plus, I felt that the more positivity that’s out there, the better. And if someone could learn from my bad times and screw ups, that would be amazing too. So I sought to share stories that made me smile and laugh, music and videos that motivate me, and my own life lessons that I hoped would push others to be better. Over the past year, I’ve gotten great feedback and support, and I’m so proud of that.

As always though, I have to be real about my failures and mistakes, too. This site and my work and always will be, IMPERFECT. There have definitely been times that I’ve messed up or dropped the ball when it came to posting. Admittedly, I still struggle with insecurities and feelings of inadequacy, too. Looking back at this year forced me to take a good, strong look at the things I did miss out on or didn’t do because I wasn’t as courageous as I should’ve been. Just like myself, Imperfectly B is a continued work in progress. However, the site is still progressing and that’s what matters to me.

I’ve learned a lot about myself even over this past year, and pushed myself to do better. Blog wise, I’ve learned to streamline my editorial and social media processes for easier posting, and to put myself out there more and more. As far as my personal life goes, I’ve learned to not let little things get me so flustered, to trust in the timing of my life, and, no matter how many times I fall, to get back up swinging. I’m stronger and more determined that I was even a year ago this time, and even more dedicated to using my gift of writing to positively impact others. Again, I thank you all so much for rocking with me, and I hope I have been able to make your days a little better with this site. That’s what I truly wanted in the first place.

Happy one-year anniversary, Imperfectly B…I’m hoping for many more!

Imperfectly,

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Words of Wisdom: “Work Without Permission”-Ava DuVernay

I definitely had to share these Words of Wisdom from director, screenwriter, and producer Ava DuVernay!

In this clip, Ava stresses the importance of working on our goals without permission. “Who are we asking for permission to do what we want to do? That should be eradicated,” Ava mentions in the clip. Who are you really seeking approval from? Honestly, you don’t need it. People mean well, but most often don’t see or understand the vision that has been placed in your heart. That’s okay. You can’t really expect that.

So many of us feel the need for permission or approval, whether it be with our family and friends, our bosses, or even people on social media. I went through that phase myself and, in a sense, tried to be someone I wasn’t because of that. Over time, I learned that I have to go after the vision that God has given me for my life regardless of what other people think or feel I should do. I take in a few opinions and constructive criticism from a select few, but I no longer let anyone throw me off of my life path. You shouldn’t either.

Listen to Ava’s great advice below!

 

 

Words of Wisdom: “Explore New Opportunities”-Terry Crews

I love this Words of Wisdom video from Terry Crews!

Terry started out in the NFL as a defensive end and linebacker in the nineties, but gravitated towards acting after his football career. Of course, not a lot of people saw acting as the best opportunity for him.  But Terry tried anyway. “As I kept trying new things, new doors kept opening,” he said in the clip. And look at his career now!

So often, people get deterred from exploring new things. Maybe because of fear of failure. Maybe because they feel they’re too old now (or too young). Maybe there’s doubt in ability. But it’s like my father used to tell me: “Nothing beats a failure but a try.” You really never know what the future might hold for you! You’ll only discover that if you open yourself up to trying new things and exploring new opportunities.

Watch Terry speak on this below!

 

Fall Down Seven Times, Stand Up Eight

2016 was the year where I wanted to quit EVERYTHING. I wanted to call it quits on my writing, on my 9-5, on my personal life, on my financial goals. In spite of people thinking the complete opposite, I felt like I had been working my tail off, and was consistently falling flat on my face.

I was being rejected left and right from new opportunities and pitches. My boyfriend and I were struggling to balance our hustles and time with each other, with both of us starting to feel slight. I was searching and searching and couldn’t find an affordable place of my own to live. And I had lost two of the most influential women in my life basically back to back. I felt incredibly stuck and also mad. And it was beyond just making me a little upset and discouraged. It was straight pissing me off and making me want to give up completely.

BUT…I couldn’t help but keep going.

Maybe it was the strong passion I had towards my goals or the fact that I hate quitting. Maybe I was just a straight fool, but I couldn’t stop. I told myself in 2017 that I would do what I needed to do to make life better all around. I was led to start work on this site, and the positive vibes from it helped get me together. I stopped pointing fingers and complaining so much, and attempted to do all that I could do. I prayed more and reflected, and worked on having a more positive mindset and being more about my life. I communicated feelings better with those around me and made more time for my personal life. And after every rejection or failure (because those definitely didn’t stop happening), I learned from it, picked myself up and kept it pushing.  And every now and then, God would give me a win to remind me where I belonged and keep me motivated.

I keep on falling and falling, but I always get back up. Fall down seven times, stand up eight. That is really times 100, but it’s real. You’re going to come up against some hard challenges and times when you seriously want to throw in the towel. But if you’re truly invested in making a better life for yourself all the way around, from professional to personal, you’ll get back up.

As cliché as this analogy may be, look at babies. When a baby is first born, he can’t even hold his head on his own, let alone try to walk or run off somewhere. But a baby’s curiosity and determination really, in retrospect, is something fierce. He wants to get moving on his own terribly. He starts with little things—rolling over, scooting across the floor, grabbing onto things to learn to stand. Then it’s the few wobbly steps and falls right on his butt. He’s laser-focused though, and keeps on falling down and standing back up until he finally gets it. Pretty soon, those steps are confident and smooth, and he even puts some speed on it and learns to run. However, all of that doesn’t come without its share of missteps, falls, and probably even bumps and bruises. But he picks himself up, learns from his mistakes, and keeps going because all he knows is that he wants to move forward. For real, for real, babies are crazy resilient like that.

[ctt template=”9″ link=”8YyKw” via=”no” ]I keep on falling and falling, but I always get back up. Fall down seven times, stand up eight.[/ctt]

That’s how we have to be. We have to be so determined to move forward that even failures, mistakes, and rejections can’t deter us. If and when we fall, we don’t stay down too long. Matter of fact, after a while, you start to see failures as part of the process and it doesn’t phase you like it used to at all! But I know it still gets hard, so here are three ways to work through your failures:

  1. Remember that your delay is not your denial. Things may not happen exactly how you want to right now, but that doesn’t mean they never will. The only way that they DEFINITELY won’t is if you walk away for good.
  2. Throw yourself into your goals anyway. It can be building up your business idea, starting a new class to strengthen your skills, or even beginning counseling or meditation (mental/emotional goals matter too!),
  3. Find outlets to de-stress. There are going to be times when you’re completely irked and over it, but finding outlets to help you keep calm helps. Exercise. Hang out with family and friends. Whatever makes you happy and can take your mind off things sometimes.

Have you continually had to pick yourself up after failing multiple times? How did it pay off for you? Tell me all about it in the comments!

Imperfectly,

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Inspirational Jam: “Bird Song (Unafraid)”-Jade Novah

“Picture with me, you’re alone in the sky. No one can touch you, you’re flying too high…”

 

Jade Novah may be known for her impressions of Beyoncé and other artists, but she’s also a very talented singer! I heard this song by her one day, and had to share it for this week’s Inspirational Jam.

Let’s be honest. We live in a world where being messy and mean gets a lot of laughs and likes, and it can be discouraging. Jade’s beautiful track “Bird Song (Unafraid)” focuses on us being unafraid to be and love ourselves simply as we are. No matter our skin colors, our sexual orientations, our sizes, whatever. Jade encourages us to live as birds in the sky, uninhibited by what other people say or think. I hope that it uplifts you all today!

You can get this song on Apple Music and other online outlets now. Take a listen to the track below…

 

 

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